All the Problems

So, yesterday I was browsing the internet through a wonderful little tool called Stumble Upon (which kicks ass). Eventually, I came upon a website that listed all the problems of philosophy. My first thought was "wow cool!" then "they are missing a lot of problems, how problematic our lives would be if we didn't have this list" and "who was dumb enough to try and write down all the problems in philosophy?"

Philosophy is something that can't be understood by trying by making lists of stuff that don't make sense. Well actually, that's not a bad idea...moral of the story, everybody who would call themselves a philosopher is probably confused about a ton of stuff and can't explain why

This post kinda sucks

sorry ya'll

The Mike and Seth show

Me and my buddy Seth have something in the works, and it will be really really cool!!

I promise!

Secret Kroger Adventure and Toy Story 3

So the other day at work, I was asked to drive over to another Kroger to pick up some corn. Finding driving much more fun than fruit stacking, I agreed to do so. Little did I know that I was on a super secret mission.

When I arrived at the target area, I began to sweep the area for "the goods." I blended right in with the locals, having much experience with the dialect such as "shallots are this way sir" and "let me check the back room." After a couple of hours, I was able to find my contact on the inside and pick up "the goods" after the secret base was infiltrated I was on my way to the extraction point when my cover was almost blown. One of the guards asked me about the price of particular good. She caught me unaware, but I was able to throw out a "1.99 a pound" before I made it to the extraction point and made my getaway.

when I got back to my Kroger, I was asked if i got the goods.

"mission accomplished"

Toy Story 3 is also really really really good

THOSE FUCKING BUGS

so, you know how when you're outside enjoying the nice summer surroundings. Birds are singing, sky is blue, and flowers are pretty. Pretty awesome right? Well, then it happens.

If you know me well, you know that I got bothered by things that no one cares about and really aren't that big of deal. BUT THIS IS A BIG DEAL. THE CICADA IS BACK.

I was working in the yard today when I heard that insipid racket return for it's annual botherfest. They make everything less fun including puppies, playing catch, and ironically, shooing them away.

I don't remember when I realized I hated the "buggers" so much (HA) but that's not the issue. The issue is that they suck.

More E3 Reactions!

Well, the Big 3 have had their conferences, and I think it is pretty safe to say that Nintendo is the winner!!

Why you might ask? The main reason can be found in Nintendo's brilliant long term strategy. A couple of years ago, Nintendo introduced the Wii and started the motion control shit storm. A couple years later, sales of the Wii are starting to slow and the competition is announcing their own motion control devices. So what does Nintendo do? They realize that the "motion control market" is almost over saturated, so they present a spectacular show of new games and a new portable console with one the best launch lineups EVER, making Microsoft and Sony look ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooold.

well played, Nintendo. Well played indeed

E3 Reactions: Day Uno

For those who don't know, E3 is a big ass videogame shindig that happens in LA every year that nerds like me care about a lot, so here are my thoughts about the big stuff happened today:

The only event I got to watch the Microsoft presentation, so i'll mostly be talking about that. We all had a pretty good sense of what was going to be happening at this conference: Microsoft making a convincing argument for Kinect and showing a shit ton of cool games. Thankfully, they managed to pull that off. Got to see some cool demos of Gears, Halo, and Call of Duty and showed that Kinect has the potential to be a little more than an gimic like PS3 sixaxis. Really love the big ESPN deal and can't wait to see how that turns out!! GO FLYERS! Really surprised Kinetic did not get a price!! It makes sense though, as Sony is showing off their motion control thing tomorrow, putting the pressure on them to make a new pricing announcement. cool business move

oh yeah new xbox model

Random Updates

1. Burn Notice is the coolest show on TV now and everybody should watch it. Spies are awesome

2. I'm finally becoming less of a loser at Kroger!

3. I'm not very good at updating my blog!

4. I miss Lost!

i'll make real posts happen, I promise. Anybody want to rant about a certain topic?

Krogz

I am happy to say that my first few days at Kroger have gone well. I didn't die, nobody caught on fire, and nobody got poisoned!!

I really wish I had a sign that said "I'm new, don't ask me questions!" that wasn't my dumbass face. sigh.

The major surprise of the these past few days was that it took a good 3 hours to realize my name was MIKE JOOOOOONES. Speaking of my co-workers, they are all sarcastic jerks, self labeled "the rejects of kroger."

I think i'll fit in great

The Real Day 1

Tomorrow is my first real day on the "sales floor" of Kroger. While i'm not too nervous, that will change dramatically if they ever refer to me as "fresh meat". Something about the phrase literally scares the shit out of me. No idea why. Subconscious fear of meat? Thoughts?

For all the videogame enthusiasts out there, me and my buddy Seth are going be starting a videogame blog/podcast!!! We're currently in the pre-production phase (the blog has nothing on it, we suck at recording stuff, and I somehow disrupt the nature of sound when talking into a mic) but i'll let you know when we have something awesome rockin

Fragile

Today I was driving to work to finish up some training stuff when it hit me. I don't know what it was, or what caused me to have this realization, but everything (EVERYTHING) just seemed fragile. I'm not sure in what sense everything was fragile, but the universe around me that was once strong felt weak.

I feel like this is something I'll experience many years from now, the day I realize my youthful body is gone. I just hope the youthful spirit stays.

In other, more hilarious, news, I find it awesome that someone made a fake BP Public Relations Twitter account:

http://twitter.com/bpglobalpr

I swear I saw one for the oil spill itself, but I couldn't find the link :(

The Prince of Kroger

This post is a double dose of blogy goodness!!! yay!!! Prince of Persia review and the wackiness of Kroger!

Let's get started with Prince of Persia. PoP is your typical summer swashbuckling movie starring that one guy whose name I can never spell (Jake Gyllenhhhiadjifdsa). Anyway, the movie revolves around Prince Dastan's discovery of a time-bending dagger after his country invades a neighbor that allegedly has weapons (not Iraq). Action wise, there are a lot of really cool set pieces and some scenes that I enjoyed because I'm a sucker for time travel plot lines. Other than those few scenes, there is nothing really standout about this movie. It's like Disney sucked the fun out of the Pirates movies, made a setting swap, and called it Prince of Persia. The characters just aren't interesting enough for me to have really cared about what was going on.

I guess I'll conclude this short review with this: for a video game movie, it's not half bad.

So, Kroger training is in full swing now. By training, I don't mean working with people on the floor to figure out what work will actually be like, I mean taking computer courses to learn how to lift a box in my "green zone," that bananas are the most popular fruit in America, and that you can avoid germs if you never touch anything ever. It's the bureaucratic training stuff that I really dislike about having a job like this. I honestly feel like this is only shown to me so Kroger has a case against me in court should it arise.

I can feel the fun loving part of me becoming a little more like Al Gore every time I complete a course about lifting safety. But hey, at least I get paid.

Alan Wake Review

Another game review:

If I've learned one thing from following loooooooooooooong development cycles of games, it's that they usually end badly. However, Alan Wake proves that a long and winding road does not spell doom for a game.

Alan Wake is psychological thriller/action game in which strange events befall Alan Wake (a writer) during his vacation in a town called Bright Falls. The story of the game has a very Twilight Zone feel, which is made even more interesting by good voice acting and a memorable cast. The game is broken into day and night segments (the day being mostly story driven while the night is action based). The nighttime combat segments do a really great job of creating a constant tension through the superb use of lighting. The darkness creates a constant state of fear and alertness while the light makes you feel safe in a way that few other games accomplish (making lights that flicker out before you reach them the worst shit that can happen ever).

Atmospherically and story wise, the game is great. But Alan Wake is plagued by many nagging problems that keep from being an A+ game. The combat becomes a chore halfway through the game and just obnoxious by the end of game, which doesn't bode well for a combat system that is mediocre at best. The game also took me about 7 hours to beat, which makes for a really short game in which the story mode is all there is.

Alan Wake is not a bad game, but it's flaws in essential parts of the game and it's short length make it impossible for me to justify a full purchase. However, there is a lot of fun to be had in Alan Wake and is definitely worth a rental.